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Without further ado, here are your Freezer Burn 2016: Myths and Legends events so that you can plan ahead to make this your most legendary Freezer Burn yet. We practice Leaving No Trace, so remember to BYOC (bring-your-own-cup). See you on the Fraya )'(
All the Time @ All over the Fraya
Igniting potions unto the days, Illuminating elixirs of the nights, Therapeutic revelations assured. Come to us or we’ll come to you. Look for us on the grounds. Professionally Yours, The Apothecarians
The Charlatan Booth
Ongoing throughout the Weekend! @ Renegade Bunnies
Step Right up! All your new age woo needs under one booth. Enjoy a homeopathic elixir whilst getting a humour adjustment, realign your whatevers with a rakey treatment. Bend spoons with your hands! Dr Wolf and Madam Avocado’s interactive performance art booth has the right snake oil for you!
Will it happen? It just might, any time! @ In a DOME, any DOME!
DOMEBALL!!! Find one of the four fathers (Zoltan, Dimitri, Partytime and Astro) and demand DOMEBALL take place. All we need is a DOME! We will bring the Monster Bag with the gear. Wear Orange and Green, and get your DOME on!!! Will it happen? It is up to you DOMEBALLERS!!!
Ongoing all weekend @ The Darkade
Bring your ID the first time you visit us to complete your Questing Prerequisite! Your reward will be a wristband that gives you access to the Darkade whenever it is open.
Solace Prayer Flag Project
Ongoing all weekend until the Temple Burn @ Red Lantern Inn
Triangle piece of cloth supplied. Place a word or phrase that might act as a wish for peace or acknowledgement of beauty – something that gives you solace. Cloth is dyed naturally with shibori techniques. Once dried, the cloth will be placed in the Temple to burn.
Evenings @ Kanuckistan Outpost
BLASTO Duello ray gun blaster shooting range, now with more flame effects. Come settle disputes by fire! Or just have a friendly duel. Evenings at Kanuckistan Outpost.
The Live Birth of the Dragon Spawn!
Whenever the water breaks! maybe Saturday… @ Somewhere near Sanctum Rouge
Last year the mother of Dragons fornicated with Evil Lord Zoltan’s dirty dragon tail. From this union, a seed was planted, and the mother is almost ready to pop! Come forth and witness the live birth of the prophesied Dragon Spawn.
Libations and Lounge
Friday and Saturday dark o’clock @ Elysium
Come lounge in the sacred plushy space reserved for the Heros of the gods. Sip on the heady nectar supplied by your hosts (BYOC). Spend some time with the Sultan conferring over the two hookah. Please respect that this is a cuddle positive space only. Thank you.
Bouncy Castle Time!
Saturday and Sunday 10 am to noon @ Kidsville
Bring your little Burners to Kidsville for some play time and a jump in the bouncy castle! Parental supervision is required.
Calling all Mail Enthusiasts!
Saturday 11 am & 5 pm; Sunday 11 am & 2 pm @ Bea Arthur Memorial Post Office
Do you have a great sense of direction? A talent for decoding poor writing? The Black Frost Post needs you! Fulfil your dreams of mail delivery to the masses. Drop by BAMPO and grab a few letters to deliver to their new homes. Help us get er done!
Formal Friday (Classy as Fuck Friday)
All day Friday @ Anywhere and Everywhere
Move over Tutu Tuesday, Formal Friday is now a thing. Let us class up the Fraya where anyone and everyone should wear their suit, tux, dress, gown, or anything else that is fancy on Friday.
80’s Dance Party
Friday 1 pm to 3 pm @ The Unholy Grindhouse Mutant Vehicle (parked near the effigy)
Gilly, Rae Rae and Sam are hosting an all 80’s dance party on the Fraya! Everyone is welcome to come and dance to the most fun music the 80’s has to offer. Dress in your best 80’s gear or come as you are. Bring a cup!
Señor Prime’s Space Girls
Friday 3 pm ish @ Mobile from Space Gnomes Camp
Setting up your camp is hard, that’s why Señor Prime is sending his best Space Girls out with some encouragement. Have your cup ready, watch out this stuff is rocket fuel.
Friday 4 pm @ Hello Kitty Adventure Time Breakfast Club
Got some space pants? So do I! Come meet up with us wearing them for photos and fun (pant-like substitutions to be deemed acceptable by participants). Bring a theme-related pun or two to share.
Friday after 5 pm @ Consensual Sex Pistols
A macaron cookie tower on a rotating cake stand. Cookies will be various flavours. Some delicious and some definitely not delicious. Spin the wheel and take a chance.
Trick or Treating
Friday 6:30 pm to 9:30 pm @ The Catacombs
It’s always Hallowe’en at The Catacombs! Folks of all ages, come Trick or Treat at our door and show off your costume in exchange for something sweet. Treats for your grown-up so tell them to bring a cup.
Sanctum Rouge Celebrations
Friday 7 pm @ Sanctum Rouge Camp
Belly Dance Stylings of Tracy Marie and Katie Sgnoflake. We pride ourselves on comfort and this year we are kicking it up a notch to be the most beautiful AND comfortable camp yet. So we decided to celebrate with Belly Dancing. Help us celebrate. Bring your own cup.
Friday 7 pm to 10 pm @ Bitches n Bacon
Who doesn’t love tail! Come get some at Bitches n Bacon. Show off your tail if you have one, or get one from us. The best tail can be won through victory on the dildo jousting field. Courage boosting supplied.
Cock Erection Ceremony
Friday 8 pm @ Rainbow Cocks Camp
Come worship the giant cock. Bring your empty cup.
Friday 8 pm @ Space Grove
Welcome Home! It’s been a long year since you’ve been on the Fraya! Come celebrate your triumphant return at Space Grove, a full-on sight & sound collaboration between Space Gnomes & Grove Crew.
Friday 8 pm to 10 pm ish @ Zombeez Bar
Something smells fishy down at the Zombeez bar. That’s right, the fishiest Codsino is back on the Fraya. Slap on your wetsuit, shine your scales and dress to impress in your fishiest finds. Test your luck on the greatest Codsino games seen on dry land. Aversions to fish not recommended.
Heroes and Villains Mixer
Friday 8 pm and onwards @ The Darkade
Join us for the official kick-off party of the Darkade! Sport your spandex, strap on your cape and come rub… ahem, ELBOWS with your arch-nemesis. (Costumes are very much encouraged.)
Lowdown Showdown at Sun Down at the 99 Luftballoon Saloon – The Finale!!!!
Friday 8:30 pm @ The Saloon
All right pardners, this is it. The Final Lowdown Showdown at Sun Down! Evil Roy Slade vs Ol’ Buckeye Bill… over the one and only Dirty Donna Dun-a-lot. It all ends here where it all began. It’s gunna be Explosive!
Through the Veil: Psychedelics and Death & Dying
Saturday 10 am @ Hello Kitty Adventure Time Breakfast Club Dome
Humans are curious about making sense of other realms, whether in journeying through non-ordinary states or anticipating what happens with energetic transitions when we die. Do psychedelic medicines help us “practice” what crossing over will be like? Join interactive presentation/discussion; prepare to contemplate your own cosmic final destination travel plans.
Journey through the Chakras
Saturday 10 am @ Valhalla Yurt
What do you want more of in your life? Prosperity? Love? Coffee? We can help! Join Veronica + DaeMano for a journey through the chakras, which will include a chakra meditation, chakra aromatherapy and coffee. Bring your own cup. Each participant will be given a chakra aromatherapy gift!
Lantern Building Workshop
Saturday 10 am to noon @ Space Gnomes Camp
Build and decorate a Rice Paper Lantern that you get to keep! Easy to build! All supplies are provided! Lanterns are beautiful at night! Bring your Lantern on Parade with us during Saturday and Sunday night Burns! All ages and abilities; kids under 10 with adult.
Rhinestone Cowpeople Pancake Party
Saturday 10:30 am to noon @ Vegas Morning After
Rest and recharge your weary soul after a hard night out on the strip. Come for this family-friendly pancake breakfast with all the fixin’s to kickstart to your day. Soft tunes and coffee for the keeners. If you want bacon, bring some. Pack your cup, plate and utensils.
Saturday 11 am (weather permitting) @ Meet at Oracle Station at First Response
Come dressed in your silliest costume and be prepared to create awareness of MOOP!! Don’t know what MOOP is? Even better! Get some hands-on experience and help us show others how fun getting rid of MOOP can be! Everyone is welcome to join us as we frolic the Fraya!
Play the Stocks!
Saturday 11 am @ Bitches n Bacon
Come learn about the captivating world of stocks. We will have a hands on demonstration, then the immediate real world opportunity to practice your networking skills. Business attire not required. Stocks can be a little constrictive, but you can expect these stocks to really move!
Saturday 11 am @ Red Lantern Inn
Create a ZenDoodle Masterpiece; quiet the mind, tune out outside noises and cut through the clutter. Meditate with the black and white art of Doodling. Let your creativity flow.
Kids Yoga (ages 4-10) with Kate
Saturday 11 am to 11:45 am @ ReNarnia Playground
This playful class introduces principles of yoga in an informal and creative way. Your child will experience inclusion, expression and connection through breathing exercises and playful poses. We will provide some yoga mats, but please bring one if you have one!
Freezer Burn Variety Show
Saturday noon @ Space Grove
Friends, Families, & Children of all ages… Step right up & bring your enthusiasm (and a chair) to the Space Grove for a delightful display of family friendly performance art and sound carefully crafted to start off the day’s entertainment, featuring some of our community’s brightest stars!
Motorhead Power Hour
Saturday after Freezer Burn Variety Show @ The Unholy Grindhouse Mutant Vehicle (near the effigy)
Motorhead frontman, Lemmy Kilmister, will always be a legend. We’re celebrating his life and 30+ years of rock stardom with an all-Motorhead power hour. Bring a cup.
Dildo Tricycle Jousting Tournament
Saturday 1 pm ish @ Road near Renegade Bunnies
For Honor! For Glory! Dildo tricycle jousting tournament. Self-explanatory. Must be comfortable with others jamming dildos at your face.
4th Annual Zombeez Brain Eating Contest
Saturday 1 pm @ Zombeez Bar
Bring your rotting gut to this gruesome feast of mangled white matter. Teams of two gorge themselves on brains (& special brains for kids) for the glory of the title. Prepare for the slaughter!
Saturday 1:45 pm ish @ Space Grove
The real heart of Freezer Burn is its Volunteers. We love our volunteers. How better to show our love than a wedding reception party?! Come get down and sing along to your favourite jams. Nibbles and treats provided. Bad wedding wear not required but always enjoyed.
Inca Quinoa Soup for the Mystical Soul
Saturday 2 pm until it’s gone @ The Xtatic to Be Here Club
Serving up 20 gallon vat of vegetarian friendly soup. Bring a bowl, cup & spoon. Come ahead of time and take a turn stirring 20 gallons of deliciousness.
So You Enjoy a Good Spanking! Now What?
Saturday 2 pm @ The Darkade
An introduction to Impact Play and Sensual Spanking.
Contact Staff Basics
Saturday 2 pm @ The Flociety Stage
An introduction to contact staff. Plane Theory. Front plane rotors. Continuous hand-wraps. 1 beat, 2 beat, 4 beat weaves. Simple anti-spins and isolation. Don’t worry if you lack a staff we will have a bunch extra.
The Legend of Zorro Salsa Dance Class
Saturday 2 pm @ Elysium
Learn to dance like a sexy Latina that can heat up the dance floor hotter than a spicy burrito or the legendary Zorro who’s sexy gyration liberated a nation. Come as you are, Zorro masks are encouraged and will be provided. All ages. Bring your own cup.
Saturday 3 pm @ Off the Space Grove Path
Have you ever dreamed of taking a nice shower at Freezer Burn? Now you can!… As long as you’re cool with everyone watching. This is Gnomette and Sgnoflake’s Shower Show, and YOU are the star! Don’t forget to bring a towel! Biodegradable soap included. Spectators encouraged.
Shitty Block Party
Saturday 3 pm @ Zombeez Bar
Our crew smells and the music is horrible. Ruin your Saturday afternoon and come on down to the Shitty block party. Join the scum of the Fraya as we shit on sunshine, lollipops and anything else that makes your mom smile. Bad attitudes recommended. Bring your own cup.
Fishing with Flociety
Saturday 3 pm @ The Flociety Stage
Do you like fish? We like fish. Staff theory explaining how fishtails work. Transitions from holding the staff into the roll. Drills to increase control and confidence in the movement. Branching out, tricks that flow smoothly from a fishtail.
Breakfast! But for Dinner! Brinner!
Saturday 3 pm @ Hello Kitty Adventure Time Breakfast Club
Breakfast for dinner. Bacon, eggs, pancakes and oranges. Bring your own plates, cutlery, and a cup. We will be handing out some harm reduction packages (till they run out). Last year we fed about 120 people. Hope to do the same or better this year.
SPF 420: Reggae Sunburn
Saturday 3 pm to 7 pm @ Lazer Lounge
Bredren and Sistren, come join your selectors Purgatory and the Dub Monk, for sun-soaked island jams. Coconut bras and banana hammocks welcome! At the Lazer Lounge from 3 pm to 7 pm.
Hip Hoop Hooray
Saturday 3:30 pm to 5:30 pm @ Space Grove
A hip hop inspired prop jam for all our flomies and homies. Bring your gangsta selves down cause the circus is in town. Hell yeah! -Markus, Betty and Veronica
Anthesteria Toga Party
Saturday 4 pm @ The Disciples Camp
Don your finest toga and join The Disciples in celebrating Dionysus. Bring your own cup.
Strip Cards Against Humanity
Saturday 4 pm @ The Darkade
Come on down for our twist on everyone’s favourite card game! Please bring a blanket, towel or scarf as a barrier for your bare behind.
Errrbody’s Aslan Party
Saturday 4 pm to 7 pm @ ReNarnia
Join creatures of magical proportions and ReNarnia’s alike for a janky celebration of our awesomeness. At ReNarnia, errrbody is Aslan and we want to dance, bounce and share with you. Libations, good tunes, company and vibes promised.
Freezer Burn Tattoo Parlour
Saturday 4:30 pm @ Hello Kitty Adventure Time Breakfast Club Camp
After Hello Kitty Adventure Time Breakfast Club “Brinner!” event, get a set of expert knuck tatts from our team of professional Sharpie users. For people who like time, this means probably from 430 pm ish to 6 pm ish depending on demand. You bring the knuckles, we’ll supply the markers.
Partytime’s Bachelor/ette Auction
Saturday 5:30 pm to 7 pm @ Space Grove
Once again we will challenge the principle of Decommodification, by selling people for no money. The currency we use is Civic Responsibility, Gifting, and Communal Effort. So, make sure you bring plenty to bid on a dream date with one of our fantastic bachelors or bachelorettes.
Rainbow Cock Hour
Saturday 5 pm to 6:30 pm @ Rainbow Cocks Camp
Bring your bowl and cup, enjoy some cock soup (vegan, gluten free, and our famous Lipton Cock Soup) with grilled cheese served up by our smokin’ hot Rainbow Cocks crew. Sweet tunes of our resident DJs with lots of rainbowy cocktacular goodness everywhere. Life is beautiful!
Pre-Burn Fashion Show
Saturday 7 pm @ Near the Effigy
You ready to shake your little tush on the catwalk? You brought your costumes; it’s time to show ’em off! MC’d by Space Gnomes very own Gnomega, with the stylin’ sexy beats of Vanilladisco. Come and do a little turn on our catwalk, yeah, on the catwalk, yeah.
Rope Performance by Sukti & Faedon
Saturday 7 pm @ The Darkade
Such form, much grace! Spectators welcome. No touching and please watch quietly and hold all questions until the end… or better yet, come ask them at the Rope 101 class. Like rope? You really won’t want to miss this!
Smasher’s Power Hour
Saturday 7 pm to 9 pm @ Lazer Lounge
I’m a man of few words. Smasher’s Power Hour is your time to get things going before the burn. It’s all about bangin’ beats at the Lazer Lounge, 7 pm to 9 pm. With love, Smasher
DJ Shallow Cauldron’s David Bowie Tribute Hour
Saturday sundown @ Zombeez Bar
Come join us for a righteous hour of celebrating the legend with bang’n Bowie beats. Dress to impress. Bring your own cup.
Purple Rain Power Hour
Saturday 11 pm @ Zombeez Bar
Prince recently joined the ranks of the dead artist society. As Zombeez, we are in the business of coming back to life (sort of) and that’s what we are doing for Prince. Join us in purple. The oldies and the oldier, obscure and music you didn’t even know was Prince!
Lantern Parade – Effigy Night
Saturday 9:30 pm Pre Burn Celebration @ Near the Effigy
Look for the Lantern Parade at the Effigy! Illuminated Revellers will be carousing amongst the burners with many paper lanterns preceding the Effigy burn! “We want you” to carry a lantern before/after the Burn! Want to build one!? Look for “Lantern Building” in WWW, Sat 10 am!
Really Fucking Punk
Saturday midnight to Sunday 2 am @ Lazer Lounge
Oi! Oi! Oi! Stick an extra safety pin through those pretty ears and put on your best leathers. Lazer Monkeez and Unholy Grindhouse join to bring you 2 hours of punk and hardcore. Bring your own cup. Midnight to 2 am at Lazer Lounge, after the burn.
Myth into Legend
Sunday sunrise @ Mega Myth Marquee Sign
Watch as we torch the Myth and turn it into a Legend.
Happy Hour Workshop
Sunday 10:30 am @ Valhalla Yurt
Come get your happy on!! Learn what makes you happy and develop skills to find your happy in the default world where freebies aren’t so free flowing. This is an interactive, self-empowerment workshop designed for anyone who loves adventure, community building and FUN!!!! Serving Summer’s apple pie delight – bring your own cup.
Father’s Day Brunch!
Sunday 11 am @ Kidsville
Are you a father? Do you have a father? Do you know a father? Are you a mother so rad you deserve to celebrate both Mother’s Day and Father’s Day? Then come to Kidsville on Father’s Day for food and appreciation!
Sunday 11 am to 1 pm @ Church of Respect
A gathering of musicians and singers to raise our voices to some songs we all know. This year we will be hosting a church bake sale during Sunday service. Lots of homemade goodies. We have a new song book this year so get ready to howl.
Faerie Soup and Sandwiches
Sunday 11:30 am ish @ Camp Faerie Tribe
Sunday Morning Coming Down…. join us for homemade soup and grilled cheese sandwiches while listening to the songs of legends. The soup will be vegan friendly. Service starts around 11:30. Bring your own dishes.
Sunday noon to 2 pm @ Near but not within Kidsville (near top of hill to Space Grove)
The Left Coast Chapter of the AB/BC Collective is proud to bring you the second Freezer Burn French Fraya. Enjoy fresh cut french fries with all of the fixins including gravy, cheese curds, chili, hot sauce and more! Family and Vegan Friendly. BYOPlate. Leave No Trace.
Pretty Pretty Princess Paddlin’
Sunday 1 pm @ The Darkade
Wear your prettiest Princess attire and come paddle or be paddled!
Metal & Meat!
Sunday 1 pm to 2:30 pm @ Space Grove
It’s the Space Gnomes annual Metal and Meat party! MAYHEM AND MEAT!!!! CARNAGE AND CARNE!!! Feast on the infamous ManBurnPig while rocking out to the vicious sounds of MOOP (Metal Out of Place)!
Steampunk Experimental Afternoon Tea Party
Sunday 1 pm to 3 pm @ Red Lantern Inn
Allow your taste buds to experience a new world of flavours. Miracle berries (in tablet form) will change the way your taste buds sense flavour. Suddenly, sour things become more sweet than you imagined. A variety of foods and favours will be available for your tasting experiments. Casual steampunk attire.
Releasing Toxic Energy through Forgiveness
Sunday 2 pm @ Near the Temple
Self Love and Healing shared in a space of exploration. We’ll redefine what Forgiveness is and create some major energy shifts together.
Afternoon High Tea
Sunday 2 pm (or after church of the jerk finishes) @ The Enchanted Forest
Dress up in your finest tea party attire and join us for an Afternoon High Tea at the Enchanted Forest!
Rope 101 by Sukti & Faedon
Sunday 2 pm @ The Darkade
Can you knot? Can you not knot? Come learn! Our lovely presenters will share their passion and knowledge with you which will enable you to explore the versatile realm of rope! Newbies welcome & partners encouraged (but not necessarily required). Rope will be supplied!
Chuckles and Cheer with Gulliver Twist
Sunday 2:30 pm @ Space Grove
Instead of encrusted into a sock, here for you instead, the legendary grown up sperm himself, Gulliver Twist. Behold the copulatory spawn of Dalai Lama and Buddha and experience the explicitly flavoured mythical stand-up as we ultimately cum together. Sunday at Space Grove, between Metal & Meat and Funk Jam.
Golde & Rae Rae’s 5th Annual Funky Fresh Funk Jam
Sunday 2:30 pm to 5:30 pm @ Space Grove
This jam comes equipped with stereophonic, funk producin’, disco inducin’, twin magnetic rock receptors. Celebrate 5 funky years of fresh grooves at Golde & Rae Rae’s legendary event with 3 hours of funk mixed by the groovalicious Van Damage.
Radical Sustainability Workshop
Sunday 3 pm to 4 pm @ ReNarnia Information Station
Join ReNarnia’s Chief Inspiration Officer and Philosophers of the Round Table for “garbage smoothies” and discussion surrounding Burning Man’s 11th principle, Radical Sustainability. Learn ins and outs of dumpster diving, sourcing/manifesting building materials, off-grid/sustainable living initiatives and making the Fraya and Playa more accessible through our Gift It Forward program.
Bologna Pony Riding Tournament
Sunday 4 pm @ The Bologna Pony
Who thinks they can ride the Bologna Pony the best? Demonstrate your pelvic integrity at the Bologna Pony, located on the lower level near the temple and saloon at 4 pm on Sunday. Are you the superior cock rider? Prove it and take home the first annual Bologna Pony trophy!
Sunday 4 pm to 4:45 pm @ Zombeez Bar
Bring us your babies because baby brains are the tastiest! Yum! After the baby buffet… They will of course rise again as zombabies that we will race! Fastest zombaby conquers all and wins bragging rights for life! No guarantees that your children will return to their pre zombaby state.
Freezer Burn Family Photo
Sunday 5:30 pm @ Space Grove
Every year since we took our first family photo. There has been a re-occuring statement “oh I just missed the photo I wish I knew when it was.” Fear no more. Be at Space Grove between the Funk Jam and the Burlesque Show. Bring your camera and your biggest smile!
4th Annual Freezer Burn Burlesque Show
Sunday 5:30 pm @ Space Grove
Come Feast your eyes on the Dyonesian Delights Cabaret. There you will see how a myth becomes a legend.
Sunday 7 pm @ Space Gnomes Camp
Come watch as our Sexy Ginger Lumberjack chops his wood for your viewing pleasure! We’ll use the wood for an effigy burn to follow!
Mythical Inspiration: A Journey to Planet Possibility
Sunday 7:30 pm @ Disco Dive
Don’t myth-Stake this for an ordinary event! Steps encouraged in new myth-Chievous + myth-Behaving ways! myth-Interpretations may be myth-Understood but never myth-Calculated! What? To decipher this code show up in inspiring costume ready for a DANCE journey with Karebelle, DaeMano + Sean Lacroix that will take you to another planet!!!
Lantern Parade – Temple Night
Sunday 9:30 Pre Temple Burn @ Near the Temple
Look for the Lantern Parade at the Temple! Illuminated Revellers will be holding space amongst the burners with many paper lanterns preceding the Temple burn! “We want you” to carry a lantern before/after the Burn! Want to build one!? Look for “Lantern Building” in WWW, Sat 10am!
Fraya Appreciation Zombeez Happy
Sunday 10 pm to close @ Zombeez Bar
Come to the Zombeez and join others as we celebrate one more year with stories of adventures and all the fun we have just had. Rub shoulders with your fellow neighbour and say good bye until next time we are all together. Bring your own cup. Good times and good bye!
Sunday Slow Down
Sunday after the Temple Burn @ Disco Dive
Come get sexy and slow to the sounds of DJ BaranBaran. Snuggle and sway and sing along to all the chill tunes you know and love. Formal wear encouraged.
HKATBC Porn Parody Night
Sunday midnight @ Hello Kitty Adventure Time Breakfast Club
Come join us in the movie dome as we screen porn parodies of our three namesake movies: Hello Kitty, Adventure Time and The Breakfast Club! Approx runtime: 4h30min. ***Adults only event.***